
Focus. Determination. Control. Athletes pride themselves in mastering all three. But give them some time off from the game and those terms drop from their vocabulary quicker than a Roethlisberger rape charge. Most player don't need an entire off-season to explore the realm of public embarrassment though. College athletes resort to more wholesome means to waste away the time. Which you can guarantee has more to do with a lack of funds than actual self-control.
For some, a simple rain delay provides the perfect stage to showcase their true athletic talents. Just ask the Florida Atlantic University and Western Kentucky baseball teams, who demonstrated their “versatility” by doubling as the in-house entertainment during a two hour rain delay. Considering the stands were quite bare though, their target audience was clearly not as invested in the vamping techniques used as the boys themselves.
Give players a whole night in between games, hotel room included, and the rate of creativity coupled with the amount of unoccupied time continues to grow exponentially. Add in some old school jams, some impromptu props (what's a slumber party without a pillow fight?), and a sports star's best friend and worst enemy, a video-capturing phone. Now future NBA ballers can create a music video masterpiece rivaling the epic nature of Lady Gaga's “Telephone.” If only these West Virginia bracketbusters could channel their extra energy to something a bit more constructive...Wonder if Duke voted for the scary ghost story route?
" Time well spent ." -Alex McKeown
Meanwhile, in the professional realm, lip syncs aren't really cutting it to make the time go by faster. Yet, if players put more time into focus, determination, and control on and off the field, the only lawsuits they'd see would come while running on the treadmill, watching re-runs of Judge Judy spitting knowledge on slumlords and evicted tenants. David Ortiz figured since the MLB's 40/40 club is out of reach, he'd make an exclusive club of his own, where he controls who could join in the fun. But maybe if Big Papi spent more time on the elliptical or in the cages and less time expanding his beer belly, one of his 99 problems would not include a suit from Jay-z.
Mom always told you, idle hands are the devil's workshop. Players like Plaxico are preaching the opposite though. If he kept his hands idle, and his pants a bit tighter (David Stern's first slide in his wardrobe presentation to Goodell, perhaps?), he could be adorning blue and white rather than orange head-to-toe. More importantly, Plax could have warned his former teammate about how to better control items in his pants in night clubs. Note to Big Ben, world language classes in the off-season are always a fun filler. Takes up plenty of spare time, you can learn the meaning of “no” in multiple languages (just in case confusion arises), and there's no helmet required. If all else fails, WVU may be looking for some new back up singers.
Give players a whole night in between games, hotel room included, and the rate of creativity coupled with the amount of unoccupied time continues to grow exponentially. Add in some old school jams, some impromptu props (what's a slumber party without a pillow fight?), and a sports star's best friend and worst enemy, a video-capturing phone. Now future NBA ballers can create a music video masterpiece rivaling the epic nature of Lady Gaga's “Telephone.” If only these West Virginia bracketbusters could channel their extra energy to something a bit more constructive...Wonder if Duke voted for the scary ghost story route?
" Time well spent ." -Alex McKeown
Meanwhile, in the professional realm, lip syncs aren't really cutting it to make the time go by faster. Yet, if players put more time into focus, determination, and control on and off the field, the only lawsuits they'd see would come while running on the treadmill, watching re-runs of Judge Judy spitting knowledge on slumlords and evicted tenants. David Ortiz figured since the MLB's 40/40 club is out of reach, he'd make an exclusive club of his own, where he controls who could join in the fun. But maybe if Big Papi spent more time on the elliptical or in the cages and less time expanding his beer belly, one of his 99 problems would not include a suit from Jay-z.
Mom always told you, idle hands are the devil's workshop. Players like Plaxico are preaching the opposite though. If he kept his hands idle, and his pants a bit tighter (David Stern's first slide in his wardrobe presentation to Goodell, perhaps?), he could be adorning blue and white rather than orange head-to-toe. More importantly, Plax could have warned his former teammate about how to better control items in his pants in night clubs. Note to Big Ben, world language classes in the off-season are always a fun filler. Takes up plenty of spare time, you can learn the meaning of “no” in multiple languages (just in case confusion arises), and there's no helmet required. If all else fails, WVU may be looking for some new back up singers.
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"Scalding!" -Alex McKeown...
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